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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23268343">Steady intimacy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writing_basketballs/pseuds/Writing_basketballs'>Writing_basketballs</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT - Stephen King</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Internalized Homophobia, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 07:27:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,030</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23268343</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writing_basketballs/pseuds/Writing_basketballs</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Emotional Intimacy: When people feel safe sharing their feelings with each other, even uncomfortable ones.</p>
<p>Richie looks back on the summer of 1989 and how he finally comes to terms with his feelings.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eddie Kaspbrak &amp; Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Fix - Relationship, The Losers Club &amp; Pennywise (IT)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Steady intimacy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emotional Intimacy: When people feel safe sharing their feelings with each other, even uncomfortable ones</p>
<p> </p>
<p>That experience happened with Richie Tozier was nearly a decade ago. It’s the summer of 1989, seven teenagers managed to kill a killer clown, and the world didn’t feel so heavy for once. The explanation of the clown even entering their lives still couldn’t even be explained by the seven children. So making the best of what they had, assuming the clown was dead, was to have a normal teen summer. The fresh scars of seeing floating children and being clawed by pennywise couldn’t have stopped them from going to drive-in movies without cars, camping, and jumping off cliffs into lakes. Richie Tozier, one of the seven children, spent his summers at arcades, theaters, and often the Kaspark resident. Eddie Kaspark was a hypochondriac fast talking 14 year old that made Richie’s body warm at the very thought of him. So Richie would spend summer nights trust-passing territories he knew weren’t meant for him to see Edward Kaspark. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The sun had finally settled and the night was beginning. Nothing but the sounds of cars driving down lonely streets and the yellow glow of the street lights were seen. You could hear the chirping of crickets and Cicadas buzzing like crazy. The scorching heat of the day turned into a soft hazy humid night, which was perfect weather for Richie to hike to Eddie’s house. It was a cozy looking house from the outside, the green, lively grass at perfect length, and not a piece of paint chipped off the house. You would have assumed a perfect middle class family of four would be living in such a well kept little two story house. Instead lived a health-obsessed teenager and his controlling mother; Left alone with no father or siblings. Richie knew their relationship was rocky after Eddie found out his athema and allergies were all a hoax, so would sneak to Eddie’s room only in order to avoid Eddie’s mother. So after walking a couple of blocks, Richie reached the tidy little home of the Kaspark’s and began his climb up the rough tree next to the sallow green house. He reached the roof, making his way to the wide window leading to Eddie’s room. He knocked on it softly, and through the glass, he could see Eddie shake his head but walked to the window anyway. He unlocked it and opened it, careful not to knock Richie down. “What do you need, Chee’?” he whispered, dreading his mother hearing them. “To hang out with you stupid..” Richie huffed out a little laugh in return. “I didn’t walk all the way here to say hi and leave.” so Eddie moved to let Richie in. Richie could see he hesitated to the idea of letting him in but didn’t bother mentioning it. He padded in softly, careful not to make noise and landed onto the cushion of Eddie’s sand colored carpet. He then began slipping his chucks off and felt the carpet underneath him, which was now a homey feeling he’s used to now. “So Eduardo, what’s the plans for tonight?” he smiled falling into his made up bed delicately. Eddie started by sitting next to him and let out a long ‘uh’ before side eyeing Richie. “Well, it was to finish ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’, but you’re here.” Richie grabbed at his shirt near his chest. “I’m hurt! You don’t want my company?” he spat dramatically and started learning into Eddie. Eddie laughed and shoved him away softly. “I don’t care. What are you trying to do?” “Let's go to the lake.” he said excitedly. Eddie looked at him disgustedly. “This late? Don’t you think they’ll be murderers already there? You know, throwing their victims into the water? Do you not watch the news?” Eddie was already starting his rant about murders and Richie would be first to die, but it was useless. “C’mon Eddie. Eds. Eduardo. Eddie bear--” “you’re so fucking annoying.” and Richie got that sudden warm feeling seeing eddie begin to smile after he was trying to be serious. “Fine. but if jeffery dahmer or something kills us, i’m gonna kill you.” “but we’d be dead?” “i’ll double kill you jackass.” and Richie couldn’t help but laugh. “Sure stupid.” and without a sound afterwards, they were gone. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They eventually made it to the forested area, the soft sounds of leaves rustling and the scenic view of the water glistening underneath the moonlight. “Wow..” Eddie whispered, looking out at the view. While the view of the lake and forest around them was beautiful, he couldn’t help but believe his view of Eddie was even more break taking. “Yeah, i know, right?” Richie smiled eyeing Eddie. Eddie had the same glisten in his eyes the water had which made Richie hypnotized with his eyes. But he’s saying this because Eddie was his best friend. And best friends were allowed to admire each other’s beauty, or at least what Beverly had told him. They were quiet for a while before Eddie started peeling his shirt off. “What.. what are you doing?” Richie asked, as Eddie tossed his shirt carelessly to the ground. “I’m gonna swim. Obviously.” and he looked down the clift hesitantly, but decided against everything and ran to the very edge and jumped, plummeting into the water. Richie watched, his chest tightened as he watched Eddie fall, and felt something shifted in him. The way he saw Eddie have fun was different. It was refreshing. So Richie grinning, ripped his shirt off and ran right off the edge following in Eddie's footsteps. He crashed into the water violently, and laughed as his head returned out the water. “I can’t believe you did that.” richie laughed. He couldn’t even see because of his glasses all the way on top of the clift. Eddie rolled his eyes, but smiled. “It’s not like I haven't before..” and something about Eddie now, made Richie intrigued. And he felt burning hot. He felt absolutely drunk off the hazy summer night and the presence of Eddie. Eddie made him feel stupid. Stupid and brave. “Just now we’re not soaked in fucking blood.” and Richie laughed, trying to humor the memory, no matter how horrifying it really was. “Yeah, just like me after your mom’s period.” and Eddie splashed him with water. “Shut the fuck up Richie.” and of course, he laughed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Now they’re sitting back on the clift after hiking back up. “Eddie?” “yeah Chee’?” “why’d you come out here?” Richie asked, leaning back to look at his best friend. Eddie looked back at him then at the lake. “Because you wanted to.” and his stomach did flips. Richie’s known Eddie since primary school and wouldn’t have ever thought of doing something so stimulating in his life. But he did all this, hiking and going swimming in the dead of night, all because Richie suggested it? “What about Bill. What if Bill asked you to do this. Would you still go?” and he could see Eddie thought about it, but he shook his head. “No. it wouldn’t be the same.” and the warmth devoured richie whole, even if he was freezing after swimming. Eddie did things to Richie Stan, Bill, Ben, Mike, or even Beverly couldn’t do to him. “What do you mean wouldn’t be the same?” and he can hear Eddie mutter out a little chuckle. “Well, me and Bill aren’t like me and you. We’re best friends. And best friends are supposed to do stupid shit together.” he smiled. Richie swallowed harshly, and looked up at the smoldering moon. He and beverly have done stupid shit before, but never like this. He looks at Eddie's naked skin, and feels an itch at his fingertips, and his heart’s speeding. He’s seen Beverly’s skin as many times as Eddie’s but it was all just skin. Eddie made him feel like a person. which was wrong, stupid, brave and whole. So it shattered him. He had six other best friends that didn’t nearly make him feel the way Eddie made him feel, and he believes now's the time he comes to terms with it. It’s not like he’s never thought about what it’d be like to be in love with a boy, as in Eddie, or the boy he met at the arcade, but he thought they were just thoughts that crossed his mind. But now, he knew they weren’t just what-if’s but were a feeling. A feeling he only wished would stop. “What do you think of faggots?” the word slipped carelessly from Richies mouth, and Eddie looked at him stunned. “Don’t say that. It sounds ugly.” and Richie looked down. “I'm sorry.” and they were quiet again except for the sounds of crickets stridulating. “Well i don’t like the word. They’re just people a group of people gave a different title because they love differently.” Richie licked his lips, which were chapped and dry. “What if.. What if you knew.. Knew someone who loved differently..?” Richie croaked. He needed to know how Eddie would feel. He was his best friend after all. “...i don’t know Richie. Why? Why are you asking me all this?” Eddie looked scared, like in one wrong move he would run. So Richie didn’t realize hot tears were rolling down his face. It was like the world was crumbling beneath him, like Eddie knew his secret without Richie even confirming it. “Richie, are you oka-” “Bowers told me i was a fairy! A fucking fairy because his fucking cousin sucks at street fighter! And.. And what if he’s right? He’ll be right and everyone’s gonna hate me and i don’t want to be fucking different!” Richie wheezed out. Eddie just looked at him like he had a second head. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Richie..” Eddie gripped his hand, getting Richie to flinch at the contact. “I don’t hate you. The losers aren’t gonna hate you. We’re all different. You’re still Richie trashmouth Tozier, you still tell rude, corny ass jokes, you still have the same giant ass glasses and stupid hawiian button ups, and you’re still you. And that’s all that matters to us.” Eddie comforted, and Richie chuckle wavered. “Was that supposed to be an opportunity to make fun of me Eds?” and Eddie shrugged. “ a little. But seriously. I don’t care. Come here stupid.” Eddie said with his arms open, and Richie took comfort in Eddie’s arm, which made his heart flutter. So instead of letting go, laid back, and watched the stars decorate the sky. He laid next to Eddie and with his arm under him. And everything felt right, and he felt as normal as different can be. “Why are you so fucking sweet eds?” Richie whispered and felt Eddie shrug beneath him. “I don’t know really. I mean I care about you, and you’re my best friend. But sometimes you’re really fucking annoying. But so is everything i love about you.” and richie laughed in good humor. Drunk off the night and Eddie, he felt awfully courageous. “I could kiss you..” and it was quiet. Eddie looked at Richie and something in his doe eyes were big and scary but warm and tender. “Chee’..” and breathes apart, their lips started touching. They were inexperienced soon to be high schoolers, so nothing about this was skillful. But It felt right and warm. They were messy about how their lips were supposed to lock, but they fit like they were meant to be. Eddie was kissing Richie back and was engulfed in a hug with each other. They broke apart and everything felt fuzzy and euphoric, but scary. Eddie’s eyes were squeezed tight but Richie’s were wide open. “Eddie?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“..Yeah?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re… you love different too?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Eddie pressed two fingers to his lips, this licked them as if to test Richie’s question. “Yeah.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rich leaned onto Eddie’s shoulder and began laughing. His heart was beating out his ribcage and was dizzy in love. “Let’s keep this between us.” Eddie nodded, lazily throwing an arm around Richie’s chest. And for another hour, they stayed just like that, curled into each other's bodies. As best friends, and lovers. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So this is my first ever IT fan fiction!!! I know I'm gonna look back on this one day and cringe, but I'm proud of it right now :) </p>
<p>Also, I also uploaded this to the IT amino so if you see it there don't freak out.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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